Ladies.
I need your expertise!
My little boy is smitten with a little girl.
This is serious.
So here’s what happened. Andrew came home from school and told me that he likes a girl; she asked him to friend her on Facebook (okay, so that’s not the serious part). I told him no computer until he finished his homework.
You have never seen any kid do quality homework so fast. I know. I checked.
So after they became Facebook friends and chatted it up there for awhile, Andrew summoned his nerve to ask me this question:
“Mommy. Is it okay if I Skype with my friend?”
Ummmm… I guess so? Is that a thing? Is that what 12-year-olds do now? This makes me feel old. Except I’m only 32… but Skype-ing a girl you like before a real phone conversation seems awkward, right?
So he set a time with this little girl, fiddled with getting Skype to work on his tablet, and called her. My little boy called a girl.
So me being the nosy mommy that I am managed to peek over his shoulder as he perched on the couch . She is completely adorable. They talked for what seemed to me like a reeeeeally long time about nothing.
The next day Andrew asked if it would be okay if they Skyped again? And also, could they hang out sometime?
Wait. Back up a minute.
Is hanging out like a date? Because he’s 12. Annnd 12-year-olds don’t date. They just call someone their boyfriend or girlfriend for like 3 weeks and then break up via notebook paper in the hallway at school. So. Because Andrew rarely requests activities with friends, I figure I’ll just go with it. I asked him what would they do? Where would they go?
When I was 12 I was allowed to go to the mall with my friend and walk around. We probably made the sales girls at Claire’s completely crazy. And we always ate tacos because they were super extra cheap.
Here’s the problem: our mall is THE LAMEST MALL EVER. I’m not even kidding. It’s the WORST. The whole thing is carpeted, most of the storefronts are empty, there is NO COFFEE. Whoever is in charge of purchasing for our Belk should be fired. Repeatedly. And there are hordes of mall walkers. You’ve never seen so many mall walkers. Mall walking is such a popular activity that they advertise it on the giant light up sign outside the mall. Maybe they’re hoping the mall walkers will patronize one of the 5 awful shoe stores?
Anyway.
Our mall is the opposite of fun.
I drew on my ability to think fast and suggested they go out for ice cream? I was met with a way less than enthusiastic response. Apparently that is not cool.
She said he could come hang out at her house. And to that my response is um, hell to the no.
Am I being ridiculous? This is the question burning in my mama brain. I asked, “What would you do at her house?”
He said, “Ummmm, I don’t know…. go for a walk?” I’d like to think that is a wholesome activity, and maybe it is, but this girl is a little older than Andrew. And when I was just a few years older than Andrew we did dumb things on walks with friends. Like (Mom. Stop reading.) smoke cigarettes.
I offered to drive. To let them order ice cream and stay far away from them. And, in my opinion, it is much nicer to take a girl out somewhere than to just hang out at her house. I think if she lived next door it would be different (except if she lived next door I would not like her at all because those puppy-abandoners/snatchers have tied the baby puppy to the porch and left her unattended in the cold since they ran off with her the other day. They are on my list.). I don’t know. Am I being crazy?
I need to know what you think.
- 4 cups cooked chicken, very finely chopped
- 1½ cups crisp tart apples (such as Gala, Pink Ladies, or Granny Smith), cut into small cubes
- 1 cup celery, very finely chopped
- ½ cup red onion, very finely chopped
- ½ cup dried cranberries, coarsely chopped
- 2 teaspoons lemon juice
- ½ cup whole natural almonds
- ½ cup light mayonnaise (or ¼ cup light mayo, ¼ cup Greek yogurt)
- ½ teaspoon salt
- pepper to taste
- Pre-heat the oven to 350.
- Place the chicken in a large bowl.
- In a medium bowl toss the apples, celery, onions, and cranberries with the lemon juice. Set aside.
- Scatter the almonds across an ungreased baking pan in a single layer. Place them in the pre-heated oven to toast for 5-7 minutes. Watch them closely! **See note**
- Take the almonds from the oven and coarsely chop them. Add them to the chicken.
- Add the apple blend to the chicken and almonds. Stir in the mayonnaise and/or the Greek yogurt a little at a time (until you are satisfied with the consistency) to coat.
- Toss in the salt and stir.
- Keep refrigerated until you’re ready to serve.
I haven’t the slightest idea why it has taken me so long to share this recipe.
I’ve made it and photographed it so so so many times, but I guess I’ve been holding out on you. This is one of those things I could make blindfolded, though there’s lots of chopping involved, so I’m not sure I’d recommend it.
Mamas weigh in! Ladies– I need your two cents.
HOLY BANANAS BATMAN!!!! WOW!!! First off that is SO odd, they go to school together and then they Skype? Kids today! lol He must REALLY like her if he wants to look at her while talking to her…most guys talk on the phone so they can play video games at the same time they’re talking to you lol Um HELL NO on the hanging out at her house though…SLUT!! haha That’s just my opinion of girls today, 12 is practically 16 nowadays, kids experimenting younger and younger, I would avoid this as much as possible lol Do you have a skating rink or roller skating thingy they could go to? If anything…she should be at YOUR house so you can at least monitor their actions!!!! Maybe you guys could have a pizza party and they can make their own pizzas and watch a movie??? This is just so unbelievable!!! I can’t, seriously can’t get over the fact that it has finally begun….dating…oh dear god your life will never be the same!!!! LOL all I’m saying is this is the time where your Mama-Stalking needs to be on point!! See what this girl is like on Facebook, look at her profile…if she has any skanky photos make her your new bestie and only allow them to hang out at your house lol The second he goes there….it’s all over!!! lol OMG you HAVE to keep us posted I’m dying over here, you must be in hell over there hahahahaha
I am such a mommy stalker. I check his Facebook feeds and anyone that posts questionable stuff gets deleted. Delete!! I will keep you posted but I am so not ready for this! Thanks for making me feel better! Andrew acts like I’m overreacting. I’m not though, right? Totally not.
You’re so not but he will never understand that until he has kids of his own lol He just wants you to let him do whatever he wants to do….heck no Mr. Andrew!!! lol Lock him up until he’s 18!!!! haha Good work on the FB stalking!!!
Speaking from experience as mine are now 26 and 28.
12 is too young for hanging out..that is what school is for. No movies, no skating, no walks etc. If relationship remains for more than a month and you allow her to visit your home….keep them in eye view, feet on the floor at all times, must sit up, no laying…keep younger brother involved. Enjoy. CK
Well… I don’t think they see much of each other at school, so I’m okay with facilitating an activity, but I remain firm on the ACTIVITY part. There can’t be no plan. Evan will be SO HAPPY to be involved. Great suggestion!! I’m so glad I’m not being crazy. Thanks!
Here’s the deal, if you MAKE this lovely lunch for me, I’ll tell you all
I’m trying to think about what a dork I was at age 12….that’s 6th grade? I went roller skating and couple skated and got kissed behind the telephone booth (yes, people don’t even have THOSE anymore) – so what do I know – I’m 42! Why don’t you see if she can come to your house – that way you can keep your eagle eye on her at all times. Good luck – sounds like puberty is HAPPENING NOW!
Her coming here to eat dinner or play a hectic round of Skip-Bo with us would be fine by me, but if I had a little girl I wouldn’t dare let her go to a boy’s house, so I haven’t suggested it. I wanna go roller skating because I WANNA GO ROLLER SKATING! Plus I’d love to see Chad roller skate. I think it would make my whole world a better place. But I think our skating rink is kinda scuzzy… not sure. I was a total geek when I was 12. And I had snaggle teeth. I don’t know what to do with ANY of this! But I’d happily make lunch.
Hee hee… good luck with it all -and I can’t wait for lunch
You are not crazy Mom….My son is turning 30….total freak out for me..BUT ..when HE was 12, you would not believe the stuff that was going on IN SCHOOL!!, let alone in someone’s house….. 12 IS NOT too young for things to happen….things are nothing like they used to be…it sounds like your Son is an adorable, sweet guy….but hormones being what they are…I’d make sure that you always have a visual on them….
Yeah… he knows he’s not going to her house. I shut that down early. I’m trying to find a happy supervised medium! So happy to have so much professional mommy insight! Thank you!!
Oh Heather, welcome to the sleepless nights ahead of you! Being a mommy spy is hard work!
I say group activities only, and I told my kids they weren’t allowed to have a boy/girl friend until they were much older (never gave a magic age). It takes some pressure off of them cause its kindof cool to be a “couple” with a classmate! Great looking sandwich!!
Thanks, Sandra! I’m definitely walking a line here… yikes!
I am not a mummy, nor am I in any way close to being one, so I can’t really comment here. which is maybe as well, because I seem to be in the minority…I am thinking back to when I was 12, we used to hang out at the bowling alley and occasionally go out to the carpark and kiss a boy from a group of boys who were as awkward, embarrassed and desperately-trying-to-look cool as we were giggly, silly and..welll also desperately trying to look cool! which doesn’t help the situation any. I think the idea of her coming to your house is a good one (my mum would always be fine with this, as long as she knew the other child’s parents would be there), or what about the cinema – you could drop them off/pick them up/go to watch something else while they’re there, but they’d feel like they were doing their own thing too? I don’t know, as I say, I am in no way the person to ask on this one! But your boys sound like real cuties, so at least I reckon you’ll have some idea what’s going on without too much nosing around (my poor mother could have woked for the CIA the amount of infor she actually got directly from me!)
I’m definitely falling in between the extremes here… I know that if I don’t find a compromise I’m just asking for unnecessary trouble from my cute boy. Flat out no isn’t an option. My boys DO talk to me and I wanna keep it that way. I also want Andrew to learn how to treat a girl! I told him it was important to go out and do things, not just “go hang out” at her house. Chad has them opening doors for me always, and carrying the groceries (so adorable) in for me. I think that we’ve settled on a Saturday afternoon movie; we’ll be around but not right in their faces. It feels like the middle to me. You might not have little ones, but teaching counts for something!!
Teaching might count a bit, but they’re only 6 – I hope they’re not about to start dating each other too! Hehe! Saturday afternoon movie sounds like a great idea to me – let me know how it goes! good luck!
Oh HECK Heather! Speaking as a mother of two boys I honestly don’t know what I’d do..I’d definitely feel the same way as you! I would feel much more comfortable having the girl over to hang out..that way you will feel more in control of things. My two boys are 9 and 8 and they talk about girls they like in school which on one hand makes me feel pleased they feel that they can talk to me about it and on the hand I’m like..OMG you’re too young!! My 9 year old was only saying today his best buddy is “dating” someone lol
OMG my kids tell me that, too! And then I try to explain that nobody’s “dating” anybody because none of their little friends have jobs or cars and they all have bedtimes. Doesn’t it make you feel happy though, that they tell you stuff? That part makes me happy.
I know aren’t they funny? I definitely feel happy knowing they can talk to me about girls and feelings..I just hope it lasts until their teenage years! We’ll see
Oh you are a much more lenient Momma than me.. The rule in my house was no dating (for my girls & boy) until 16.. They could pass notes, chat a bit on the phone but other than that, nada, zip..But every kid is different so if he’s gonna “date”, be sure you put one of those little GPS things in his jacket
Love this recipe, yup, going in my notebook..all of my favorite ingredients!!
Ohhh mah gah this CANNOT be called dating. This is me chaperoning Andrew while he makes plans with a friend girl. And only because he LITERALLY NEVER asks me to do anything with friends outside of school. He is so smitten with her, though. I’m pretty sure Andrew knows not to press his luck with me, though because I just say whatever pops into my head and the likelihood of embarrassment if he strays from my idea of appropriate is pretty high.
This is my favorite chicken salad ever. Enjoy!!
My kiddo is five and I’ve already decided he is never, ever, ever dating. He’ll go to our state college, live at home with his dad and me, and when he graduates, he can move into the house next door. That’s totally reasonable, right? And ugh, Skype?? I’ll never be able to keep up with it all! There’s so much technology for kids now. When I was 12, my girlfriends and I would take turns calling boys and then hanging up when they answered because we were too busy giggling and acting ridiculous.
Love the chicken salad, by the way.
Haha you might rethink the forever option when he’s a little older but all this is happening way too fast for me! The crisis was handled with a pretty good compromise, though. We met in the middle. And the little girl is COMPLETELY adorable.